After many years of working with gay men and hearing about their successes and disasters I want to share a couple tips I have learned along the way that are definitely key in having a successful Gay Relationship.
Value and respect each other and don’t take each other for granted.
Devote quality time to the relationship and don’t forget no matter how busy you get to schedule a date night once a week where you are able to be attentive to each others’ needs. You must always have shared visions and goals and a mutual respect for each other. It is important to validate your partner in the ways that are most important to him and show him not only through words but through actions how important he is to you and how much you appreciate having him in your life.
Relationships are built on honesty and commitment as well as loyalty and dedication.
It is important you both can express your true self and devotion to each other. You have to be open and non judgemental and unafraid to express your feelings and passion for each other. It is important to have a balanced life and be supportive of each other’s personal goals and growth. Always remember to be supportive of each other instead of feeling threatened. Encourage each other and most importantly don’t forget to laugh together.
Learn to be assertive and ask directly for what you want.
Even if you’ve been together a long time, never expect your partner to know what your needs are. Mind-reading and making assumptions only leads to misunderstandings and potential conflicts.
Take a technology break.
It is very hard to connect with the person sitting across from you when you are both looking at the screens of your devices. To revitalize your relationship, go on a date or set aside some quiet time together during which you turn off your devices and strictly pay attention to each other. Have heartfelt conversations, or reminisce about good times. Use the distraction-free time to revive the values, shared goals, and attraction that brought you together.
Don’t let the busyness of life take away from your relationship.
Find a balance between work, alone time, friends, family, and time spent as a couple. Make “Date Night” a regular part of your lifestyle where you avoid discussing your problems or issues and just enjoy spending that quality time together. Never take each other for granted and remember that you’re a team.